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Well.... Hung

My friends are at it again - bugging me to tie the knot (noose I argue). I keep on about how I don’t want to get hitched. Here are some of the constant suggestions that I am forced to deal with on a daily basis and my rejoinders…

• Look at how happy we are.
Happy is as happy does (my response)

• Skepticism is not going to get you anywhere you know.
So who wants to?

• There is this friend of a friend.
Yawn!

• One bad apple doesn’t spoil the whole bunch.
Who said anything about fruit!

• You know what we mean!
Yeah I suppose but seriously I ain’t looking.

• That’s what we are here for then!
Thanks. But there is something else we can talk about. Why the same old?

• Talking about old, you aren’t getting any younger.
So, who cares!

• Don’t you want to grow old with someone?
For him to tell me that I ain’t getting younger, huh?

• What’s with you? Don’t you know we want you to be happy?
Who said I’m not?

• Now listen carefully we aren’t giving up so don’t you dare come out with your pieces of so called ‘wisdom’.
Don’t you get it? I’m not looking,period.

• Just say you do meet someone who’s nice and all that?
I suppose…

• Ah gotcha!
What?

• The green signal – you gave it to us. Now lean back and let us hook you up with some nice guys who are single, doing well, great conversationalists, meet with your criteria and ahem well hung…
How will you know if they are uh well hung?

• Just leave it to us…
But…how?

• Trust us dude, we know what we are doing.
Very funny! But if this means that you stop this constant BS then go on. Just remember I am extremely finicky and mighty picky.

They get me to meet guys who fit the criteria - great conversationalists, well read, doing well, and all that jazz… but there is something missing.

Does this mean I am ‘hung’ up on someone else? (Their constant…)

Not! (My constant…)

The end. (I hope - sigh!)

ROTFL

Comments

Jeena said…
Hugely funny Yas

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