Much Ado About Something

You know that time when you want to snack on something and the lockdown has you going around in circles, simply put - you did not stack up the goodies. Huge boo-boo. You are now on a quest to find a solution, any treat suffices, even the stuff you loathed earlier. You try anything that you can get your hands on to munch, and alternatives appear out of nowhere. The kitchen is your new best friend. As you lay eyes on the stack of potatoes and start cutting away, you fry them not realizing that they get soggy if not consumed soon! The double dip is the solution, but you didn’t know that. Oh brother! You now realize that diving in immediately is a must. And you munch away. Huge relief! My go-to snack has and will always be a packet of chips, diet be dammed. I got to thinking, however, while I managed to munch on a packet of Lays (the best snack in my book), many do not even have a glass of water to drink! And as I ponder over the divide that is so glaring - the poor, the have’s, the hav...

As seconds turn to minutes, minutes to hours, hours to days, days to weeks, weeks hopefully not to months, we wait in stunned silence for directives by doctors. This coronavirus has everyone (not the Covidiots) in a confused panic. This is no bandh like we are used to in our country, this is serious. The economy which was on a downslide has plummeted further. We are a worried lot wondering how to replenish our stock. And then the worry that we do not contract any germs from the vendor who has delivered the goods. It is not only scary, but reality has reared its ugly head. This is happening in real-time, and not the movies. I want to wake up believing that it was just another movie and life will be back to normal. But is it going to be normal, today, tomorrow or even a month from now? Are we getting it that there is no vaccine at present? Social distancing keeps us free from the germs that spread rapidly. We need to follow protocol. A number of us want to pin the blame on other ...

I want to say I love you, I do not know how I want to mend fences, you fence me out How do I break the chains that bind? Hear me, when I say Forgive me I need you I hope you need me too. At a time when people are dying to the deadly virus I want to pray with you But you look away I want to hug you but you are stiff I want to feel your gaze upon me with love I need you to love me, again Can you? Though we do not talk This is my prayer for you Stay safe Be brave Be happy Be healthy I forgive you Please forgive me too. And, before I forget I need to say I love you, please love me too, someday.

Monday came with it and like every Monday, brought with it feelings of sluggishness - not wanting to get out of bed. And for the many of us who are homemakers (in a different sort of way) juggling a homebound work freelance life with limited pay, it is frustrating when the maid does not show. My story - I received a message from the maid, (which is kind given the fact that most of them don’t even bother to), but why didn’t she think of calling the previous day, I wondered. Some of her excuses are so weird that I want to scream, but remained staccato for fear of being maidless (for want of a better word). Her reason this time was an illness that manifested overnight. I guess it is because she was pulled up for something she did and decided to teach me a lesson. Her message was clipped stating that she would not be coming for a fortnight, give or take. I did not reply. What is the point, was the point, she would not have answered or I would have received a lame ass excuse. Before y...

Just another day in the life of an average person who wants to watch a rerun of Friends but has to make do while flipping from NDTV, Tiranga, India Today, Times Now, Mirror Now, and the rest. I live in hope that I can watch my reruns again! Will have to wait for the 23rd! Okay, I get it, watching television is not everyone’s cuppa today, though many of us mere mortals still turn on the television to watch a program or the other, especially the news, at this point of time, with elections going full gusto. In my life, while I would love to watch reruns of old comedies, Mum watches the news. When I asked her the other day, why not watch WWF instead - I explained that it is way cooler than the mudslinging, she looked at me as if I had lost my mind. What can I say, Mother I replied. My thoughts were, aren’t we slowly losing the plot while getting drawn into debates? I avoided saying anything more, or I would have been drawn into a debate! We are gripped into this frenzy based on rhe...

Do you get the giggles at places where you are expected to behave, like church for instance? A couple came to church and as the wife knelt down, her keys slipped out of her bag. She couldn’t reach out for them, but her husband did. While he bent down to pick them up like a gentleman, what came out from his posterior was far from gentlemanly! You guessed it, he farted! It was loud and need I dare say, smelly. He looked frightfully embarrassed while people around looked at him with disdain as if to say control your emissions fool. This was a weird ass situation (pardon the pun). But how in the world could he have controlled the gas while he bent, if it lurking within, bound to come out? Doesn’t everyone fart at some time or the other. Heck man, I have smelled terrible odors from nuns too, and while I would love to look at them disapprovingly, I refrain. A fart is just that, uncontrollable. While the priest was preaching, I got the giggles again. I looked across at the man who had a...